Snow

The lines across the mirror

tell me of your lies.

And the marks around your eyelids

cannot be disguised.

But the truth is that I knew it,

I just didn't want to say.

'Cause the truth, I knew, would cause it

to end up ending this way.

And it's a pretty shitty ending

to our happy little song.

But just 'cause I'm pretending,

it doesn't mean I'm gone.

My heart still waits in silence

where you left it on the ground.

But if you set aside the violence,

you know I'll be around.

Because, the fact is, I'm not able

to let you go again.

Our story's just beginning

so this cannot be the end.

I know I was your let down,

the failing in your mind,

but if you let me, I will pick you up,

then maybe you will find

that in the midst of all this anger,

I only saw your smile.

And the only thing that stole it

was your own selfish denial.

But just because we're crying,

it doesn't mean we're weak

In fact, there's no denying,

we'll get back on our feet.

Just give into the silence,

then let it fall away.

And, baby, stop the violence

and I'll forever stay.

Just bury indiscretion,

let go of what you knew

surrender to my love,

because I live only for you.

Be Good Until Then- Butch Walker

Always know the road you're riding on.
Always know the words to your babys song.
Try to make the most of Friday nights when they come.
Maybe turn a stranger to a friend.
Never break a heart that's on the mend.
Never let the romance ever end like I've done.
Never judge a color of a skin.
Never judge a person by their kin.
Never follow leaders that begin behind some wall.
Always help your mom across the street.
Always wash your hands when you wanna eat,
but always keep them dirty enough to see where you came from.

And it's okay to cry if you feel it coming on,
it'll let you know you're human in the end.
All these things will mean more when I'm gone,
just be good until then.

Try to see the best inside the bad
no matter how many drinks you had.
Never make a promise you'll regret come sunrise.
Try to rarely ever oversleep.
Always keep your ego at your feet.
Maybe try to practice what you preach once in a while.

It's okay to cry if you feel it coming on,
it'll let you know you're human in the end.
All these things will mean more when I'm gone,
just be good until then.

Everybody loves a hero, but not so much when they fall short
so try to keep your cape on underneath.
You don't have to try so hard to be the best,
Just know you are
and that's all that'll matter to me.

And it's okay to cry if you feel it coming on,
it'll let you know you're human in the end.
All these things will mean more when I'm gone,
just be good until then.

Hopeless- Train

I hopelessly, helplessly, wonder why
everything has changed around me.
I'd tell it to your face
but you lost your face along the way.
And I'd say it on the phone
if I thought you were alone,
why do things have to change?

But you don't need my pictures on your wall.
You say you need no one.
And you don't need my secret midnight call.
I guess you need no one.

Is anybody waiting at home for you?
'Cause it's time that will tell if it's heaven if it's hell or if it's
anybody waiting at home for you.
'Cause it's time that will tell this tale.

You're in and out, up and down,
wondering if you're lost or found,
but I got my hands on you.
Are you strong enough to tow the line?
Are you gonna make me yours
or do I make you mine?

I'm in and out,
I'm up and down,
wonder if I'm lost or found.
I need your hands on me now.

But you don't need my pictures on your wall.
You say you need no one.
And you don't need my secret midnight call.
I guess you need no one.

Is anybody waiting at home for you?
'Cause it's time that will tell if it's heaven if it's hell or if it's
anybody waiting at home for you.
'Cause it's time that will tell this tale.

I hopelessly, helplessly, wonder why
everything has to change.

Surreal

It's like a bad dream. It is a nightmare I've always had but that I never thought I would ever see in real life.
It is like everything that we had been working towards suddenly fell down in one instant.
But as much as this whole situation is breaking my heart, I have to remember that this is not about me.
This is not about us.
This is about her.
I have to put aside all of my feelings for her, all of my desires, and all of my emotions, and focus on this. This is the only thing that matters right now.
I want to help her-so badly I want to help her-but at this point I doubt she would ever let me.
She feels like I betrayed her, when I felt like doing anything besides what I did would have been betraying her.
I want to be her friend.
I am just so afraid that I lost her again.
It all feels so surreal, but so realistic at the same time.
It is like a roller coaster of thoughts in my mind, and I don't know which way is up.
I can only hope that we get through this together, as we have gotten through everything else.
And I hope that she knows how much I have always loved her.

No matter what happens, just know that I'm not going anywhere. Something in me knows that I need you forever. So you work on the now, and I'll work on the forever.

Now we wait and try to find another mistake.
If you throw it all away
then maybe you could change your mind.
And maybe, someday, we'll figure all this out,
try to put an end to all our doubt,
try to find a way to make things better now.
Maybe, someday, we'll live our lives out loud.
We'll be better off somehow, someday.

She'll take you for a ride,
show you a whole new side of life.
She'll turn your world upside down, inside out.
But once you feel her,
you know that you could never let her go.

Heartbreak Warfare- John Mayer

Lightning strike
inside my chest to keep me up at night.
Dream of ways
to make you understand my pain.

Clouds of sulfur in the air,
bombs are falling everywhere.
It's heartbreak warfare.
Once you want it to begin,
no one really ever wins
in heartbreak warfare.

If you want more, love why don't you say so?

Drop her name,
push it in and twist the knife again.
Watch my face
as I pretend to feel no pain.

Clouds of sulfur in the air,
bombs falling every where.
It's heartbreak warfare.
Once you want it to begin,
no one really ever wins
in heartbreak warfare.

If you want more love, why don't you say so
If you wanted more love, why didn't you say so?
Just say so.

How come the only way you know how high you get me
is to see how far I fall?
God only knows how much I'd love you if you'd let me,
but I can't break through it all.

It's a heart... heartbreak

I don't care if we don't sleep at all tonight,
let's just fix this whole thing now.
I swear to God were gonna get it right
if you lay your weapon down.
Red wine and Ambien, you're talking shit again.
It's heartbreak warfare.
Good to know it's all a game.
Disappointment has a name;
it's heartbreak...

It's heartbreak warfare

My hopes are in the wrong place, I know that. I know that I should be wishing towards different, more obtainable things. But I also know in my heart what I want.
I know what I need to do, what all of my friends say I should do, but I just can't make myself do it. I have spent such a long time working towards what I hope to be the rest of my life. Maybe six months or eight months or even 12 months isn't a long time in the big scheme of things, but maybe I am not as good at playing the waiting game as I used to be. Once you've had a taste of something, it's hard to get that taste out of your mouth. You are just left wanting more. I'm sure by now everyone knows that I am no good with analogies, but that is the best I could come up with. I had a taste of what could be, and now I am wanting it more than ever. But more than ever, I am nervous that the taste will grow bitter with time.
I don't want to rush it, but I don't want to have to let it go either. The distance is killing me, but the closeness took its toll as well. I need to find a happy medium; there is no room for extremes when you are dealing with something so sensitive as this.

So, note to me:
Balance yourself; don't let your head kill your heart, but don't let your heart suffocate your head.
Find closure.
Hold on.
Give her the last thing she's ever asked of you; let go.
Trade control for hope and impatience for love.
It's all just a part of the game of Life.

Always Be- Jimmy Eat World

Could have been a night like any other.
One of us has to drive,
one of us gets to think.
I'll force a laugh to break the silence.
It's gonna get harder still
before it gets easy.
You can't keep safe what wants to break.

I'm alone in this,
I'm all as I've always been;
Right behind what's happening.
She's all lost in this,
she's all like she'll always be;
a little far for me to reach.

I was just a boy like every other.
I thought I was something fierce,
I thought I was ten times smarter
Love would be something that I just know.
How you gonna know the feeling till you've lost it?
I've been losing plenty since.

I'm alone in this,
I'm all as I've always been;
Right behind what's happening.
She's all lost in this,
she's all like she'll always be;
a little far for me to reach.

Maybe something else I'm missing,
something good and your the reason.
It's a dream, but there's a real world waiting.

I'm alone in this,
I'm all as I've always been;
Right behind what's happening.
She's all lost in this,
she's all like she'll always be;
a little far for me to reach.

Moderation Nation

Something is wrong. I know it. This is not who she is.

I can't sleep with the sound of the sounds
that rage inside of me.
The feelings of anger just seem so unfair.
And the practical thoughts that erase my heart
as I pick up the phone and head back to the start
of where you left me to die without a message of where we are.

I drive back to the place where you used to live
inside of me.
I just want you to stay here
in my heart for a while.
And the weakness I feel isn't all just a fake
and the tears that I cry didn't start on the face
of a child who lost a battle with the stars.

And I know that you take me for all that I'm worth
but a dirty heart's better off left in the dirt.
Take it and put it back where I belong.

We just wanna hurt
and act like we're better.
Thank everyone else
who has been where we are.
We both know it works,
we're better off as strangers.
So why can't we just let go away?
I'll let it go today.

I fall back to the place where you used to lay
beside me.
The scars on my heart didn't need to end up here.
But I stare at your picture I left on the wall
as the memories of you still race through the hall
and I remember the time we used to have it all
Now it's all gone

and we just wanna hurt
and act like we're better.
Thank everyone else
who has been where we are.
We both know it works,
we're better off as strangers.
So why can't we just let go away?
I'll let it go today.

There's never been a happy ending.
Hearts, they break and lies keep sending
broken lives into the great unknown
I just wanna know

why we just wanna hurt
and act like we're better.
Blame everyone else
who told us where we are.
We both know it hurts,
but we'll never be just strangers.
So I can't sit and let you walk away,
I'll let go today.
Let it all just go away.
So I can love you every day.
And we'll both just float away.
I love you every day.

Rewind

I can't lie to you, we both know this. So what am I supposed to say when you ask me what's wrong? Would you rather me lie to you and tell you I'm fine, only to have you upset at the fact that you know that I'm lying, or would you rather me tell you what I am upset about? This is something that you need to figure out, because not feeling anything is not an option for me.
As I said, I feel the same way about you now that I did for the six months that you were with her. So just treat my emotions the same way you did then; with no regard. And I don't mean that rudely, just truthfully.
I know we aren't together (believe me, you make it incredibly clear sometimes), but that doesn't mean that I don't have any emotion towards you. I have loved you for a very long time, and that isn't something that is easy to suppress. It's just hard for me to see how you can tell me that I can't show you those emotions right now when you let me open myself up to you again so quickly. When something upsets me, you are always the first person that I want to go to; you're the one who cares the most and who fixes all of the hurting. But I realized last night that you can't be that person for me, at least not when I'm upset about things involving you. We need to slow down, and the biggest step that I can take towards that is to leave my emotions out of the situation. This time is about you now.
Maybe I am guilty for expecting too much, just as I am guilty for a lot of things in regards to us. Maybe I went back into this with no regard for how much it could hurt or how fragile the situation really is. Maybe I just pushed too hard. You may not believe it, but it is really not my intention to pressure you into anything. Yes, I love you and yes, I do want to be with you, but most importantly, I want that to be what you want. I think that you mistake my feelings of love for pressure. I know you aren't ready to commit to me right now, and I am okay with that. But when you talk about our future together, as you say you inevitably see it, I can't help but get my hopes up. And then something happens like last night, and I am reminded of how far away you still really are. It is like a slap in the face when something that I have longed for for so long is right there, but I can't touch it. So I react emotionally.
I know you don't see it, but you are very hot and cold. One minute you are telling me how much you love "our relationship" and the next you are telling me that I have "no right to show you my emotions because we aren't together yet." You have to understand that this hurts me. Every time you verbalize the fact that we aren't together, my heart breaks. And I know that I can't let you see that, so I try so hard to contain it that it just builds up and that sadness comes out in different areas (last night for example). Just because we aren't together doesn't mean I am not in love with you. I am not made of stone, so I cannot be emotionless, and you can't expect that from me. I don't want to be emotionless anymore.
For all intents and purposes, you have my entire future in your hands. I want you forever, I know that, but I am terrified of the day when you wake up and realize that you don't want me back. This idea is what makes me want to hold on tighter, but it also makes me want to let go because I know that me holding on only pushes you away. This is where I am conflicted.
There are two sides to every story, and I know that we both have difficulties seeing the others' points on certain issues, so I am going to try my hardest to see your side from now on.
I can't pretend that I know what to do in this situation, because if I did then neither one of us would be where we are. The only thing I can think of is to let you go. I know that you need independence and you need time to be single, so I am going to give you that. I will go back to the way I was a month ago, before I had hope. From this point on, what happens, happens. I will not push, I will not pressure.
I want to make this work, but I am not sure of what you need from me. So, until you tell me otherwise, I am going to go backwards. I am going to rewind back to the times where I mastered subtlety and patience. I'm going to go back to the time where I didn't know that you cared. I never thought I would say this, but it was easier for me then. I let myself fall for you too quickly, and I know that I need to stop it.

So when you are ready, I will be here.

Until then, you have my love.

Beautiful Mess- Jason Mraz

You’ve got the best of both worlds;
you’re the kind of girl who can take down a man
and lift him back up again.
You are strong but you’re needy,
humble but you’re greedy.
And based on your body language
and shotty cursive I’ve been reading,
you’re style is quite selective
though your mind is rather reckless.
Well I guess it just suggests
that this is just what happiness is.

Hey, what a beautiful mess this is
It’s like picking up trash in dresses

Well it kind of hurts when the kind of words you write
Kind of turn themselves into knives
And don't mind my nerve you can call it fiction
‘Cause I like being submerged in your contradictions dear
‘Cause here we are, here we are

Although you were biased, I love your advice.
Your comebacks they’re quick
and probably have to do with your insecurities
There’s no shame in being crazy,
Depending on how you take these words
they're paraphrasing this relationship we’re staging.

And it’s a beautiful mess, yes it is.
It’s like we're picking up trash in dresses.

Well it kind of hurts when the kind of words you say
kind of turn themselves into blades.
And the kind and courteous is a life I’ve heard,
but it’s nice to say that we played in the dirt.
Cause here, here we are.
Here we are.
We're still here.

And what a beautiful mess this is.
It’s like taking a guess
when the only answer is "yes."

And through timeless words in priceless pictures,
we’ll fly like birds not of this earth.
And tides they turn and hearts disfigure,
but that’s no concern when we’re wounded together.
And we tore our dresses and stained our shirts,
but it’s nice today.
Oh, the wait was so worth it.

Everything that I have wished for for so long is finally starting to come true, but I can't help but feel as though I am pushing it away. It's kind of like that experience where you try so hard not to lose something and you put it in a place where you know you wont forget about it, but then when you search for it, you don't know where it is? Okay, well...it's not exacly like that, but it's similar. I am trying so hard not to lose her again that she is actually getting more lost. It seems like the harder I hold on, the more she slips away. I don't want to pressure her and I don't want to hurt her, but I can't seem to help it. My heart tells me that I can wait forever, but my mind says that we need to go back to the place we were a year ago. And my heart tells me that going back to that place would be easy, but my mind tells me that it is going to take a lot of work. It is a constant internal battle. I just need to figure out what to do while she figures out what she's doing.


Our love is strong yet delicate. We will make it.

Love is...